when you are busy making other plans.

I HAD planned to do grocery shopping after Nick's birthday party.

I HAD planned on buying Thanksgiving food on the Sunday before Thanksgiving.

I HAD planned on getting up early the day after Thanksgiving to take advantage of Black Friday sales.

I HAD planned on going to training for my second job, enjoying Val's company when she ws home, putting up the tree, helping Ed get a seasonal job, making Christmas cookies with kids, going to church, etc.

Instead, on the Saturday before Thanksgiving, the day of Nick's party, November 21st, Ed woke with vomiting and severe stomach pain. To the emergency room we went, where he was taken immediately to the back. The diagnosis: pancreatitis. He's been in the hospital ever since. Valerie came home early from college to help out. The older kids have taken over the running of the house since I spend many days and most nights there. Jenna and Tracie take Nick to school and pick him up. Justin attempts dinner many nights. I run from hospital to work (some days) to home to shower and get fresh clothes.

It has been stressful, to say the least. I really appreciate the support of many of our friends, including Val and Tracie's mom, Patti, who went to the store and bought Thanksgiving dinner for us. My aides at school, Cynthia and Denise, who took over the running of the class and hosted my very first family Thanksgiving dinner, which I coldn't be at. Instead they took pictures and videos, and sent home a bunch of food. My administrators, who graciously gave me as much time off as I required. I ran into Karen Rubin, who offered to do anything I needed. Thanks sweetie. My friend Kathy, who took Nick the first night when we were in the emergency room, so that I didn't have to have Nick there. Our friend Tom from church, who offered us his guidance if Ed has to go to rehab. The many caring nurses at Capital Regional Medical Center, who have taken good care of Ed, especially when I couldn't be around. Ed's brother Wally and his mom Virginia, who drove all the way from Austin, just to make sure he was okay. Then turned around and left the next day since his mom had a doctor's appointment she couldn't miss. And my many other friends who offer support and prayers. Thank you all. Words cannot express how grateful I am to have each of you in our lives. You are priceless.

Here's the question of the day: How much do parents influence their children's spending styles?

If you are a spendthrift, will your children be also? If you do not directly teach your children how to handle money, will that change the course of their future? Are some people born with "money skills" while others struggle their whole lives to handle money appropriately?

My parents never taught me or my sisters about money. The closest they came was when we heard "I'm not made of money." Duh. I never knew how much my parents made or how much the electric or phone bill was. We never went without, but I remember some really lean times. At the same time, I remember a few indugences, like going to the Ice Capades (remember those?) and going to Disney a time or two. Nevertheless, when I got out on my own, I had NO IDEA what to do with money. I thought only rich money played the stock market, and that retirement would be taken care of by a gold watch I'd get after 30 years of service.

My children have such varied spending habits, I'm amazed that they are related to us at all. Nick is the saver. He wants stuff, but he also wants everyone else to pay for them so that he can keep "his" money. Justin can't keep a dollar without it burning a hole through his pocket. He buys impulsively, and because he feels obligated to get stuff for people. Valerie spends what she has. She, too, doesn't save her money. Of course, she doesn't have much, being in college and all. But she still has a larger wardrobe than most boutique stores. Tracie goes through cycles, but unless she has a specific goal, she will spend what she has. She justifies it by saying that she "needs" her eyebrows waxed, etc. Jenna works as much as she can, and is a saver. She will spend a few dollars for some smaller items she wants, but most of her check goes into her savings each payday.

I hope by going through this financial process, we are demonstrating some better money management skills to our kids. The question, though, is DOES IT MAKE A DIFFERENCE? I truly hope so.

I am trying to get things as we go along before the holiday rush starts. Because we have so many to buy for just living in our home, I don't want to wait for the last minute to get started. I have been looking for (gasp!) coupons and deals, especially for girl stuff. Clearance, discounted, stuff not ordinarily on sale during the season... You get the idea. Justin is harder to buy for, since he likes big ticket items (computer, new scooter, etc) and those are out of the question. I usually have my kids write a list sometime in November for items they would like to see for Christmas, then pick and choose according to what is on sale. I see no reason to change. I am trying to pay for stuff a little at a time, $10 here, $15 there, so we don't get hit with needing to spend a large chunk of money at once.

We haven't bought gifts for our big extended family in a while. We send stuff only to the kids, usually. And my parents and Ed's mom. With 9 brothers and sisters on Ed's side, and 4 on mine, it got too expensive for everyone, so we discontinued that. I think this year, we'll send gift cards and save on postage too. :)

There are a lot of traditions to continue, though. Cookie decorating, visiting Oven Park too see the lights and take pictures, seeing Santa, are all traditions that we can keep. We also buy for the "angel tree" at our church, with Nick helping to pick the gift. I will be looking for ideas for gifts that Nick can make for his teachers. Send your ideas to me!

Because Ed' s been out work, I got afraid. That's the only way I can describe it.

We have learned so much by being in this program. I better understand my credit score now, for instance. Where our money goes is another example.

But I was afraid, and so I didn't (gasp) pay the mortgage or the car payment last month. I was afraid we would run out of money or have an emergency. This is a prime example of why my credit score is low to begin with. Instead of paying for the "four walls" first, (shelter, food, transportation, clothing), I panicked. There, I said it. I did. Now I'm kicking myself for it. I paid them both up-to-date this month and I feel less stressed and much better. And stupid. Wll I ever learn? I hope so. For now, I want to apologize to my mortgage holder and the leinholder for my car. I have no excuse. So what do I do next time I feel this urge to hold off just-in-case?

I'd like everyone to meet the newest member of our family, Jenna. She turns 18 today. Jenna came to us about 2 months ago. A friend of Tracie's, she was staying at different friends' houses each night. She was talking about dropping out of high school (she's a senior) so that she could support herself. Ed and I knew that we were being called to take care of this bright, funny girl, at least until she finished school. We invited her to stay in our home and become a member of our family.

It was both an easy decision and a hard one. It was hard because we knew that it would put an even bigger strain on our finances, but it was easy, because how could we do anything else? Jenna is still in school, finishing her senior year. She works, and will clean houses or wash dogs or anything else she is asked to do to make money. She has saved enough to buy a cheap used car, so we are helping her look for one.

Bringing home a new daughter has had an interesting impact on our family. Our kids seem more appreciative of having parents who are supportive. In other words, they don't seem to take us for granted anymore. Seeing someone who was essentially homeless, someone young and still in school, has opened their eyes to the many blessings they enjoy every day. We may not have the fanciest house or car, we may not go on cruises or travel abroad, but we enjoy a lot of love in our home. No amount of money can buy that.

Valerie, Tracie, and Jenna on Tracie's 18th brithday

Edward, Nick, Jenna, and Donna

I've been rocking busy since the start of school. The first month of school is always a madhouse of activity. So much to get done in the classroom, plus the extra stuff I already do. This year, I am chairperson of the United Way Campaign at my school. I am also popcorn chairperson for Nick's Cub Scout Pack. (Anyone want to buy some popcorn?) Add to that the Coastal Cleanup and the other service work we do, and WHEW!

The injury to my arm has finally healed enough that I don't have constant pain. That in itself is a blessing. I can now return to doing many of the things that I enjoyed before getting my blood drawn that fateful day.

Tracie and Ed are both looking for jobs. Ed's search took a short break when Nicholas got sick and was out of school for a week. It wasn't H1N1, but he was still ill enought to be home.

Edward has been applying and going on interviews around town. Hopefully something will come of it soon.

I have been accepted for a second job. I'll be an afterschool tutor for a private company. As lead teacher, I'll be responsible for paperwork and turning in time cards, but the pay is good, and I'll just have to get over how tired I already feel when I get off work. The extra money will go towards Christmas and keeping our heads afloat while Ed looks for a job.

I don't know what the tax ramifications will be since I am considered an independent contrator, and they don't take out taxes. I want to make sure that I set enough aside to pay for that. I am also looking at getting a SECOND second job, so I can tutor 4 days a week instead of 2. Anything for the cause, right?

p.s. look for an exciting announcement on FRIDAY! Set your calendars and turn your clocks. This is IMPORTANT!

You know how you think that everything can be going wrong, but then it goes wronger? Since we arrived home from Texas, that is exactly what has happened to us. Please cry along with us as I detail the many trials that Murphy has visited upon us lately.

The day after we arrived home, I went in for a routine blood draw and the phlebotomist hit the nerve in my arm. This has resulted in almost constant pain and irritation to my arm as I go about trying to work and live my daily life. The doctor has me on some medication, and if it doesn't improve soon, I'm likely to end up at the neurologist, and possibly have surgery.

The next day, we all went back to work, and Ed was laid off. No reason and no warning. So our budget is going to be very tight, and the small extras will have to go.

A few days later, Valerie went back to college, where the health department was called on the apartments that were assigned to her. She has to move out and get a different place.

Tracie and a friend drove up to Birmingham separately to help Valerie with all her stuff. She has a LOT of stuff. On the way home, outside of Montgomery, her engine blew. Tracie and her friend were stranded on the side of the road. Val drove down to stay with the girls, as Ed drove up there to arrange a mechanic, and drive the girls home. The mechanic says the car needs a new engine. $3000, anyone? Suffice it to say, we will not be footing the bill for this, although we did arrange for Ed to drive up there Monday to tow the car back to Tally. Tracie will have to decide how to handle this. Sell the car as is and buy a beater? Save up enough to have it fixed, and take the bus to school? It will be her decision, with input from the both of us.

Ed's mom was hospitalized for pneumonia, but is now out of the hospital and doing a little better.

Yesterday, Ed called me at work and said he was very ill. Eleven hours, innumerable tests and yucky stuff later, we came home. He is doing better, and is recuperating nicely. He will NOT be going to Mongomery on Monday.

Here's what has been good about all this:

Tracie has learned that she is not such an independent adult after all. She is re-evaluating her goals and desire to move out to attend college. She is much more appreciative of the things provided for her, and sees that she needs to be better prepared before moving out. Justin is working hard at his new job at FSU, and is definitely stepping up to the plate to take care of his adult responsibilities. His is becoming more to making goals, and wants to move out on his own. He is saving money towards that end, and has expressed a desire to get his license and maybe trade his scooter for a car. Edward is searching for a job where he can have more responsibility for what goes on day-to-day. He has already been on several interviews, and we are awaiting call-backs. I have been depending more on the love and friendship of others, especially the pre-planning week when I went back to my classroom. Many of the things that needed to be done, I just couldn't do because of my arm. My friends at school and my family stepped in to fill the need, and for that I am extremely grateful. I could not have done it without them.

Financially? Well, we may not win this contest, but we are learning a lot, getting better all the time, and now will handle anything that comes our way. Our faith is intact and strong, and together, as a family and with our friends, we can do anything.

1. Plan, plan, plan

A trip with kids is only as good as the plans you make beforehand. While it might be fun the play it by ear, it doesn't work as well when you hve no place to stay the night and the kids are cranky. Or, you are 45 miles to the nearest McDonald's and the children are hungry NOW. Which brings me to my next point.

2. Pack the food and drinks.

To save money, a small cooler with drinks and snacks is a must. You may want to eat meals at quick-serve restaurants, but there may be a child or two who doesn't eat or feel hungry then. Kids are unpredictable, so you have to predict for them. Plus, a well-fed and well-hydrated child is just so much happier. Which brings me to yet another point.

3. Rest areas are your friend.

Unless you absolutely need gas, a stop at a rest area is a much better idea. They are usually cleaner, for one. Everyone can stretch their legs, without going into a convenience store to do so. Therefore no impulse buys or "gimme's" need arise. There are some very interesting rest areas around, but even the less-interesting offer what you need without spending money. The ones near the state lines are the most interesting, as a whole. Which, of course, lead to the fourth point.

4. Set a limit on souvenier spending.

You can either set a specific amount in each place you visit, or (my preferred way for older kids) give each child a specific amount at the beginning of the trip and let them decide when and how and WHETHER to spend that money on trinkets (teachable moments, people). I try to steer my youngest towards items that are either unique or that I know he will get a lot of use from. The older kids can get t-shirts because they have stopped growing, but the younger one will outgrow his quickly, so I try to help him find something else (a mug, a flag he can hang in his room, a hat). Which brings me to...

4a. This is really an addendum to point 4. Here it is: souvenirs are much cheaper off-site. We got University of Texas wear at the local discount shopping place for about half to a third of what we would have paid in the school gift shop.

5. Get the facts beforehand.

This is a little of point 1, but if you can, contact the tourism bureau in the place you are staying. There are probably LOTS of things to do in the area that you had no idea about. That way, even if you spent a gajillion dollars visiting the Mouse, there are still places to go that are free or low-cost. Our big splurge was a water park, but we also did about 8 other things that were very low cost or free. Much of that was natural sights or historic stuff that was interesting. Did you ever see the bats come out from the Congress Street bridge? If you know a local, they can usually give you some pointers, as well. Which brings me to my final point

6. Stay with relatives.

Whether you like them or not. We happen to love ours, so it works out. You will still have expenses. We are staying at Uncle Wally the Saint's house. The invasion of 6 people into his single man's abode meant that we had to stock up on toilet paper, milk, cereal, and the like. There were a few other thing to buy (cold medicine, powder for a rash) but it was still way cheaper than a hotel, especially since with 5 adults and a child we needed to get two rooms or a suite. But Wally is wonderful, allowing us to fill up his home for a week.

We’re having a great time in Austin! We arrived Sunday and have been visiting with family and taking in the sights. The trip here was uneventful, except for a strange shuddering coming from the front of the van. On Tuesday, Ed took the van in and he ended up buying a whole set of new tires or it. We had it checked out by a mechanic before the trip, but nothing was said about the tires. Luckily, we had a bit of a trip emergency fund set aside so it didn’t ruin the trip.

So far, we’ve been to see the Austin State Capitol building (free), the Alamo and Riverwalk (free), an amusement park sort of like Fun Station ($7.95 per person, all you can play and ride), watched the bats come from Congress Streeet Bridge (free), visited a local dam and watched them open the floodgates (free), went to Barton Springs to swim and picnic ($2 per person), and finally went the Schlitterbahn Waterpark yesterday (discounted tickets). We are having a fabulous time, and since we are staying with relatives, costs are pretty low. We are allowing the kids to pick out a few souveniers here and there, but we are limiting them to stuff that is wearable or useful (like a mug) and not just plain trash. There is also a spending limit in each place, so that the “gimmes” don’t take hold.

We are staying with Ed’s brother Wally, who has been a prince taking in a family of 6 to sleep all over his couches and floor, and using up his hot water. Wally lives next door to Ed’s mom and so it’s very easy to see her all the time. Everyone has been preparing authentic Mexican food for us almost every day, and when we get back, I’ll have to go on a diet! Today (Saturday) we are supposed to have a big cookout with all the family (which is HUGE) and that should be a lot of fun.

So we're not in the top 1, 2 or 3 for this challenge. We are going to have a family meeting.

Topic: what are we going to do now? I want everyone to come up with ideas about how to decrease expenses and increase savings.

We need a firm commitment for change to be able to win this contest. I'm taking a second job once school starts in the fall. I plan on getting a tutoring job after school which I've always resisted since it makes for an extremely long day. But because the legislature has cut part of my bonus for National Board Certification, and since my school lost the funding for an extra 30 minutes in our day, I need to do my part to increase our income. I hope I can get the rest of the family on board to also do some extras.